Heart Swap
by SilverUmbra
Summary: Mondays are miserable for everyone. You have to go to work, or school or whatever. Well, it's the same for legendaries, but sometimes much much worst... Hinted legendary shippings.


Hi, just a semi long oneshot I thought up. Hinted Kyogre-Groudon, Suicune-Entei and Cresselia-Darkrai. So... R&R as always!

On with the fic!

* * *

It was a nice day. The sky was a light blue, the clouds were fluffy like cotton and every bird in the forest was singing their pretty little song. The trees bathed in the golden glow of the sun, neither too weak nor too strong and it was just a perfect Saturday aftern-

"WHAT THE HELL?!"

Until, of course, a certain sea legendary woke up, looked in her mirror and realized she wasn't a sea legendary anymore, or a female at all for that matter. And this was, of course, me. A legendary couldn't go to sleep and wake up like normal Pokemon. That would be illegal.

My first unpleasant realization was when I looked in the mirror. I got up from my room, which was a palace of cool water fountains and rocky cliffs, and went to the huge mirror to brush my teeth with the small amount of psychic energy I possessed. It should have dawned on me that I was walking, something that I had never had to do (I floated,see), and I was indeed a lot heavier. But it didn't, and probably wouldn't without A) a rude awakening(I.E mirror) or B) Coffee (and lots of it).

And I, unfortunately, acquired choice 'A'.

* * *

I was reading the comics at Azelf's when my psyphone rang.

See, the psyphone is a neat little device that every legendary has. It's an actual part of the mind, made of small bits of psychic energy. These are useful because it makes it easier to contact the others when something is 'urgent'. Now of course the idea of urgent is somewhat varied...

The little part in my brain played the 'Jerry Springer' ringtone like a little radio, earning me a strange look from Azelf, who even paused from the Sports section. It usually took a war or Celebi with dynamite to make her put down the paper.

I accessed it with a sigh, it was probably Jirachi wanting to go to that new sale... "Yes?"

"SUICUNEINEEDYOURIGHTNOWSOMETHINGREALLYBADHAPPENEDANDICAN'TGETBACKTONORMAL! HEEEEELP!" A voice, clearly on the verge of tears and hysterics wailed, forcing me to cringe clearly. Even then, I tried to piece together what the legendary had said.

"Kyogre? Calm down." I started, cooing in a supportive tone, I was naturally the calmer of the two. "I'm sure it's not that bad..." this was, obviously, a bad move.

"THAT BAD!?"

Again, I cringed. "Alright, fine. I'll be right there." with that I cut the connection and got to my paws. Azelf raised her eyes from the page to look at me with a bored, almost inquisitive look.

"Kyogre is freaking out over something." I replied, answering the silent question, "I'll be back later." I sighed "Sorry I had to cut this short..." with that I darted out of the room.

The smaller legendary shrugged and went back to her reading "The Gallades are going to the Championship..."

* * *

I paced back and forth as best as I could on such heavy, short legs. I tried not to look at my reflection, it only sparked an extreme dislike as the person I was. Groudon. I hated Groudon.

Around me, my fountains sputtered, surprised at the sudden change in appearance. The rocky cliffs only shrugged indifferently.

Wait, now inanimate objects had personalities?

I shook my head as best as I could (This whole neck thing was hard to grasp) and vacantly pondered what the hell I had done to deserve this. Well, I guess the tidal wave was one thing, and kicking the crap out of Rayquaza was another...

Oy.

Suddenly there was a splash, and out of one of the pools, a blue and white wolf leapt, her twin tails whip-lashing against the drops. She straightened, readjusted her purple cloud-like cape with a flick of psychic energy. Deep ruby eyes glanced around and fell on me.

"Oh, hi, Groudon, did Ky call you here to?" She strolled past and looked up at me, "She seemed really panicked, probably nothing though."

I could _so_ argue with that.

"So... where is she?"

I gave a small gulp, "Right... here..."

* * *

Far, far, far away, Arceus, reading the paper and drinking her favorite coffee looked up.

"Mew!" she shouted, putting her cup, a black-blue with little smiley faces on it and surrounded in psychic energy, down with a clink. A second later, in a buzzing flash, a small pink cat appeared, wearing a bathcap and a towel wrapped around his pink waist.

"Dude!" he clutched his cap, blue eyes wide as Frisbees "Do you mind not doing that when I'm taking a bloody _shower_?"

Arceus gave him a flat look.

"What?"

The white legendary pulled out a small screen, made entirely with energy and gave a small sigh "What's this about?"

He looked offended "What makes you think I switched the orbs to make the two switch bodies? What makes you think I managed to slip past all of Groudon's Garchomp and all of Kyogre's Kingdra, in ingeniously so, and hack into their psychic mainframe? What makes you think all of that?"

The 'god' Pokemon didn't look impressed "Well, your psychic datapool is spiking everywhere, which hints to signs of extreme pride in something..." she continued "... and I can easily check the time from when this pride started to when it ended, which is up to this point." she paused, then added "And I have you on tape."

"Oh."

* * *

"What?!?!"

I paced around in circles, my twin tails lashing in a frenzy. I stopped, remembered I was the calm one and took a few deep breaths. I wasn't the one who was no longer a whale, she was.

"Okay..." I started, plopping down on my blue haunches, " You just woke up like this...?"

H-_she_ nodded.

I took another deep breath, trying to keep from hyperventilating "Okay. I'll contact Groudon and see if anything is up..." with this I entered the psyframe. At first all I heard was a faint buzzing noise then with a click another voice sounded. Groudon's voice was deep, gentle and calm most of the time, but when he answered I knew something was wrong.

"Y-yes?"

I intensified the connection just to hear him "Yeah, hi, Groudon, this is Suicune... Erm, well, I was just wondering, is everything alright there?"

"Yeah, every-"

There was a shuffle, a yelp and a crash. In the background I heard him yell something before another psy-connection pushed the land legendary's out of the way.

"Alright? ALRIGHT?!" another voice, with an almost Australian accent wailed at the top of his lungs "My best mate just turned into a giant, blathering WHALE!"

"_Entei?"_

"Yeah_me_, and I know this is some type of weird girl joke, isn't it?!"

I blinked very slowly, ruby eyes twitching "... Entei, tell Groudon to come here right now." before the fire lion could argue I hung up, then turned to the lizard.

"We've got a real problem here."

* * *

After a few minutes, there was a small buzz and in a flash on blue energy, a large, dark blue and white orca appeared, golden eyes forlorn. S-_he_floated moodily behind a red lion, whose green eyes looked more annoyed than Mew at one of Jirachi's tea parties.

I blanched and so did he.

"You stole my body!" we both shouted at the same time, me pointing a claw and him pointing one fin as best he could. "How dare you!"

The lion and wolf both sighed. Per usual, Suicune tried to keep everyone from killing the other. She had taken up the job ever since Rayquaza and Latias had gotten married.

"It doesn't matter who did what, only how to get everyone back to normal." she said calmly, her tails wavering behind her. "This is bad for the environment. Your outburst alone could cause earthquakes and tidal waves." she took a deep breath "So calm down and lets figure this out."

Entei, for once, nodded in agreement.

"Where are the orbs?" I asked suddenly "Where are they?"

Everyone exchanged looks.

Suicune groaned "Shouldn't you know? It is your soul, not mine!"

"Psh, like you have a soul."

"Why don't you shut up, Entei?"

"Make me."

"I will!"

Meanwhile, while those two wrestled, I slowly made my way to the room where my portal was. I stepped over a small stream, avoided the spray of a fountain and finally made it to the mirror. I only cringed slightly at my reflection. I saw the orca come up behind me in its shiny sheen.

"Mount Pyre." I commanded before bright blue light swallowed whale, lizard, lion and wolf.

* * *

I used to be Groudon's best friend. We were inseparable. Only the depth of the ocean and the heat of magma could keep us apart. When someone insulted him, they insulted me and vice versa. Best friends...

Until one day something happened. Just like a light switch, we went from best friends to bitter enemies. It was so sudden, one morning, like any other morning we met, all of the legendaries did, and we chatted. But when we saw each other we exploded. This resulted in war, a war that wiped the planet of almost all life. Only Rayquaza could stop us a that point, and hardly, even then.

Hate. I hate him. I always would, and I knew and accepted that.

* * *

And yet, now, I couldn't hate him. Maybe because I was him, so to speak. It was weird. This was the closest we had been since before the first war...

"There," he said.

I saw the problem immediately. Now the red orb was always on the right and the blue orb was always on the left. Always. But now, clear as day, we could all see that the spots had been reversed. I grumbled.

"Then all we have to do is put them in their rightful place..." I paused, trying to use a bit of psychic energy. It didn't work "Wait, psychic energy doesn't work?"

He shook his head "The orbs are safe-proofed from it in case on a psychic storm that could destroy them."

Ah yes, the psychic storms. They came once in a while. Most didn't realize they were there, but when you did they were something to behold. They were all... sparkily.

"Okay..." I paused, moving once huge, red claw and right away I knew it would be no good. "Nope, no can do."

Groudon moved his flippers almost comically "Me either. What are these things for, anyway?"

I blinked, mocking idiocy "I dunno... _swimming,_maybe?" I turned to the wolf and lion "You guys?"

Entei and Suicune sat on their haunches and held up both front paws in unison "Nope."

"Crap..." I groaned, smacking my face with one useless claw. "I guess I'll get one of the others to help." I linked into the psychannel "I'll call Celebi..."

Just as I said that, Celebi's light, cheery voice sounded "_Hey, this is Celebi's psy-voicemail. I'm not avaliable at the moment so just leave a message... Beep!"_

"Dammit. Jirachi."

_"Hiya guys! This is Jirachi, I won't be reachable for another thousand years, see ya soon, bye! Beep!"_

"Dammit. Uxie."

_"Hello, I'm not here right now, I have to go get an eye exam, wish me luck! Beep!"_

"... Mesprit."

_"Off to the moon for a bit, see ya! Beep!"_

"This is so, fricken messed up... Azelf."

_"Can't talk right now! I'm at the super bowl! Gallades vs Seakings! Whoooo, go Gallades! Beep!"_

"I hate this place... Deoxys."

_"My therapist recommended I go to the spa for a little, see you guys at work tomorrow. Beep!"_

"...Rayquaza..."

_"Sorry I couldn't take your call! Latias and I are going on a little vacation, see you Tuesday! Beep!"_

"Damn you... Mewtwo."

_"I'm off to dominate the world! Or at least blow up Mew's house while he's gone. Later. Beep!"_

"Good luck with that, Missingno."

_"I'm not a real legendary, silly! Anyways, I'm off to corrupt T.V everywhere! Adios! Beep!"_

I disconnected from the psy-channel, very close to just kill everything around me "I... no one is avaliable. No one, out of the nine, not one frickin' legendary is avaliable. What the hell is wrong with this place...?"

Groudon looked apprehensive "You only called Celebi, Jirachi, Uxie, Mesprit, Azelf, Deoxys, Rayquaza, Mewtwo, and Missingno, right."

Psh, only.

"Yeah."

He gave me a look.

I caught the look.

"Oh no... oh, come on!" I cried, waving my claws over my head, "You can't be serious! _Him?!_Are you insane?"

He waved one flipper, seeing as he couldn't nod his head "Do you want to spend more time than needed in this mess?"

Good point.

I sighed "Ugh... fine."

* * *

Darkrai gave a small sigh, nervous. The metal, swan-like legendary across from him gave the dark legendary an inquisitive look with ruby eyes, her hovering steady.

"Yes, Darkrai?"

He hesitated, clasping his claw-like hands together "Yeah, um... Cresselia, I was thinking over about how long we've known each other..." he trailed off.

She nodded for him to go on.

"And I'm starting to think..."

"Think...?"

"Yes, think." he ignored her sarcastic tone "I'm starting to think that I'm, er..."

"Would you just spit it out already?" She snapped, one ruby eye twitching and her hover quickening "I must say, did you forget to drink coffee today?"

He took a deep breath and hoped that his blush wasn't visible on his ebony face. This was the furthest he had to ever degraded himself since the last war. "Look, Cresselia, what I'm trying to say is that I lo-"

RING!

"Dammit!"

* * *

When Darkrai's voice responded, I knew he was severely angry. His voice usually calm, was still calm but very very very quiet. This, I knew, was never a good sign.

"Er, Darkrai?"

"_YES?"_

Eep.

I tried to recover "Yeah, hi... Erm, me and Groudon are in a bit of a predicament and sort of need you help..."

I heard the dark legendary take a deep breath, which was also another bad sign. "_First off, it's Groudon and I. Secondly, why the hell can't you do it yourself?"_

I racked my brain for an answer that didn't sound too insane. Then, realizing that this whole event was insane, I decided to tell him the cold, hard truth.

"Well, someone switched the orbs from their right places so Groudon and I switched bodies. We're here at Mt. Pyre but all of the legendaries that have hands are on vacation or something of that nature and we can't contact them. You're the last one we can depend on."

"The whole reason I made those was so you idiots would actually answer!" I heard Cresselia shout somewhere in the background "For the sake of Arceus!"

Darkrai sighed again "Fine. I'll be right there."

"Oh?" I was surprised that the won argument "Really?"

"Really. But I swear if this happens again someone is going to die."

I didn't doubt that threat one bit.

* * *

I yelped as a dark portal opened next to me, sending me leaping into Entei. The lion grumbled half heartedly, but I could tell by the spiking of his auburn fur that he was just as surprised.

"Darkrai!" I said, trying to calm my heart down "Hello."

The dark legendary only gave a curt nod "Whatever." he went to the orbs and with one quick movement switched their places. As soon as they were placed with their rightful place, they both glowed and with a flash, blinded everyone in the clearing.

"Holy flying miltank!" I felt the lion beside me jump back "It burns!"

The irony of that statement was almost too much.

But very slowly, as the light faded, I could tell that everything was going to be normal. Or as close to normal as life as a legendary could be...

* * *

The first thing I noticed when I opened my eyes, was that I was floating. The second thing I noticed was that I had fins. And I was blue. And Groudon, who really was Groudon, was standing across from me.

"I'm... back!" I cried happily, and would have done loops had I not been so groggy. Groudon replied around the same time, with around the same statement.

"Crikey!" Entei laughed, "Thank Arceus for that, mate!" he turned to Suicune "Yes! I could kiss you, Su!"

And he did.

And even more surprisingly, headstrong Suicune, kill-anyone-that-degrades-me Suicune only looked down and blushed, chuckling softly. This was enough to make me laugh. I was already giddy, even more so now.

"I think this calls for a coffee party, mates!" Entei laughed, "Come on!"

I nodded "Lets go, you too, Groudon!."

His golden eyes looked surprised "Really?"

Again I only nodded.

"Wow." he started "What happened?"

And I only laughed, then floated behind Suicune and Entei, Cresselia and Darkrai, with Groudon, who was now, strangely enough, my best friend again. After all of those years of war and hatred, in one day, with one act of someone else, we were friends ...

And I knew this was the start of a good Monday... and maybe something so much more.

* * *

End. 


End file.
